Quiet, Temple Food, and Books: A Three-Piece Gift of Happiness

The breeze caressing my cheeks, the nameless flowers blooming along the roadside, the soothing sound of water when I close my eyes. I’ve loved nature since I was a child. I enjoyed watching historical dramas that beautifully captured the natural landscapes, and while watching them, the thought would often cross my mind, “One of these days, I want to live in a temple for a day.” When I was in high school, my mother once told me that she needed time to clear her head and said she was going to visit a temple. But it wasn’t just a short visit; she was staying overnight. That’s when I first learned about “Templestay” programs.

After my mother returned from her Templestay, she immediately recommended it to me and my elder sister. Seizing the opportunity, my sister and I headed straight to Seonamsa Temple in Suncheon. It was winter when we went. I was worried it might be cold in the mountains, but thanks to our floor-heated room and the warm hospitality of our host, it felt cozy.

The first day, we were fast asleep after the dinner offering. As the sun set, the temple became quiet, and everything was tranquil, so going to bed early didn’t feel awkward. As the second day dawned, we put our phones away, trying to distance ourselves from the secular world as much as possible. Instead, we read a novel set in the Joseon Dynasty that we’d borrowed from the library. That book we read during our Templestay was more engaging than reading it anywhere else. Putting our phones away freed us from having to contact anyone. For some reason, a part of me felt at peace. I even wished every day could be like this and resolved, “Next time, I’ll come alone.”

Some time later, I went on a Templestay alone to Saseongam Hermitage in Gurye. Unlike when I was with my sister, being alone made me naturally refrain from talking, and the quiet room felt even more tranquil. Silence. I loved it. It was a rainy night, so I just sat there, my mind empty as I listening to the pitter-patter of raindrops outside the window. Today, people call it “spacing out.” By not thinking, I had no distracting thoughts, and petty worries vanished from my mind.

Then, suddenly, a book in the room caught my eye, a book about the Buddha’s teachings. The passage I’ll never forget said, “Letting go of all attachments brings peace to the mind.” This wisdom remains a guiding principle in my life to this day. I wondered why people so often create stress for themselves by dwelling on relationships, worries about the future, and things that haven’t yet happened. Before reading this passage, I too was someone who was overly obsessed with everything. I couldn’t easily let go of every passing relationship. But now, I’ve begun to think, “What benefit is this obsession to me?” Rather than dwelling on the past and fostering negative feelings like anxiety and frustration, I’ve learned to calm my mind. Buddhists talk about “the opportune moment for causes and conditions.” Accordingly, I’ve come to the conclusion that I won’t feel stress if I don’t cling to those who are leaving and don’t avoid those who are approaching. Since then, I no longer feel stress from interpersonal relationships.

Another memorable word was “non-possession.” I had a strong desire to buy things, which led to poor spending habits. However, I eventually realized that everything would only be thrown away when I die anyway. I learned to live my life by cherishing and using things for a long time. My solo Templestay allowed me to reflect on myself and cultivate a healthier mindset. That’s why I’ve been going on Templestays alone regularly.

On the other hand, I now believe that self-reflection is not mandatory during my Templestays. Simply resting peacefully is enough. Instead of thinking about what I have to do, I just spend time away from my phone or computer as much as possible. Feeling the breeze, climbing a mountain, gazing at the green grass, and enjoying delicious, healthy temple food are all precious gifts in themselves. If you give yourself such gifts, you can be proud of having spent your time well at the temple.

Templestays have different kinds of charm depending on the season. One Templestay I remember was the day after I took the College Scholastic Ability Test, when I went with my mom and older sister to clear my mind. It was unusually cold outside, but unusually warm inside our room. After the dinner offering and a walk around the temple, we came back to our room, washed up, and got ready for bed. Then it started snowing, HARD! I looked out the window and saw large, white flakes falling softly. The three of us smiled as we gazed at the courtyard turning white.

Until then I had only imagined snow falling while I was at the temple, but when I actually witnessed it, it was like a scene from a movie. Just that moment filled me with a sense of happiness, and I felt there was nothing lacking in my life. I often recall that scene where my mom, my sister, and I ended the day together, basking in the joy of just watching the falling snow. Especially on days as hot as these, remembering that moment cools my heart, as if it could overcome the heat.

These days, people seem to always seek some sort of stimulation, and their standards for happiness seem to have risen too high. If you are one of those people, I highly recommend a Templestay, where you can take a moment to reflect on your surroundings and read a book at your leisure. I believe that if you experience even a brief moment of self- reflection, you’ll be irresistibly drawn to its allure—just like I was.